On Words: Lifestyle

It’s a loaded word, “lifestyle.” Mostly society uses it as a sense of disdain for those who live a life outside the norm. Your chosen lifestyle is …well, you fill in the blanks. But this post is about the views of other people’s lives through lifestyle blogs and our human emotions that come to the surface. It’s about unrealistic views of other people’s lives. You can say that there is even a tinge of jealousy in this post. Well maybe more than a tinge. I admit it, I would love to live the lives some people portray in their lifestyle blogs.

There isn’t a lifestyle maven who isn’t a world traveler, lives in mansions, or goes to the finest restaurants. They live a jet set, constantly well ordered, well financed, and well manicured life. Their husbands are perfect. Their children are perfect. And they all have hydrangeas that are blooming in their summer gardens. It’s a gigantic FACEBOOK post come to life. Ok, my hydrangeas are blooming this year too, and I do get manicures. So I shouldn’t really be annoyed about that. Well, I am less annoyed and more amazed at these women and their lives.  I just don’t know how they do it.

I really don’t. They may have a trust fund and unlimited monetary resources. That is the only way I can figure this out. But at the same time, there is no money tree in anyone’s backyard, unless you are Warren Buffet you do come to the end of the paycheck eventually.

This leads me to think that either these ladies have earned a reputation that products and even trips are given to them by companies. I mean I get books free because I write this blog, so why shouldn’t lifestyle bloggers who make a name for themselves get items for free or even part of certain trips paid for. There is also the advertising bit as well. It’s why the word “clickbait” is so prominent in our vernacular in today’s day and age. More click, more traffic, higher advertising dollars, and reasons to garner items for nothing more than a  review or a post. So good for them.

I congratulate them on a job well done. I have no idea how they did it. I will be honest. I have been blogging and writing for over 10 years and I have no idea how to make money doing this job. I monetized my blog, but unless someone clicks on the links I don’t get my penny. I haven’t come even close after all these years to getting any money. But I am still trying, mind you. And no I am not really jealous of their success, any more than I am jealous of say Bill and Melinda Gates. I would just like to know how they really did it. That is all. I am not even asking for someone to do it for me, I am just trying to understand how to get it done.

The irony here is that some people were actually jealous of my autism blog and started bad mouthing me on other blogs and websites because I wouldn’t post their ignorant hateful comments. They went so far as to bad mouth me in the comment sections of the New York Times once. And I found that there is  a website, that does a brisk business apparently, where people go and complain about prominent bloggers. I was added to a thread there too. I kid you not. I have had people be jealous of what they perceived to be my success, and their right to invade certain aspects of my life when all I was doing was trying to give out free and helpful advice to other autism parents. I guess it’s the blogging version of the “Hathahaters.”

So, no, I am not jealous of these lifestyle bloggers, I am simply amazed. FWIW- all of my blogs are safe places for people to discuss what is written. Hateful comments are never allowed by anyone at any time. That doesn’t mean you are not entitled to your own opinion. You are entitled to not like a book that I found enjoyable. You can leave a comment to that effect. But it is how you present your opinion that counts. Remember, adulting is a requirement in my world.

On the other hand, the problem with lifestyle blogs that I can tell though,  just from my own little perch here at my desk, is that not a one of them speaks to the average woman. They are fantasies. They are lives that none of us can really live on a daily basis. You watch these blogs the way you watch a celebrity’s life. With amazement and awe. It’s like those who covet a $50,000 handbag found on Purse Blog.  Why and what is the reasoning for that? This is your goal in life?

(And yes, I used to be one of those women who read these high end blogs continually. But I never did desire a $50,000 bag, but I always did want a Hermes Birkin, which I believe at this moment begin at $10,000 a pop. Note that when I started my bag fetish they were $5000 for a basic one. I still love handbags by the way, I just have set my sites on some more economical and realistic purses. And I even understand that what I consider moderate costs, is still a lot of money for some people. Yes, I too have grown and developed over the years.)

Meanwhile I propose a new kind of lifestyle blog. One where instead of going to Paris, we take a trip to Target. We discuss what we can find there to make our lives better, more comfortable and more enjoyable. Instead of going to cocktail parties where the cost of the ticket goes to some charity, how about we just give to the charity or help out in the local soup kitchen? I think that we need to start idolizing people that live normal, regular lives, and that they live those lives well. Someone needs to take the interests of the average woman into consideration. I think I am going to be doing just that….




About Elise "Ronan"

#JewishandProud ...
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